“I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me. In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord; in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints. You hold my eyelids open; I am so troubled that I cannot speak. I consider the days of old, the years long ago. I said, “Let me remember my song in the night; let me meditate in my heart.” Then my spirit made a diligent search: “Will the Lord spurn forever, and never again be favorable? Has his steadfast love forever ceased? Are his promises at an end for all time? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he in anger shut up his compassion?” Then I said, “I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.” I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds. Your way, O God, is holy. What god is great like our God? You are the God who works wonders; you have made known your might among the peoples. You with your arm redeemed your people, the children of Jacob and Joseph. When the waters saw you, O God, when the waters saw you, they were afraid; indeed, the deep trembled. The clouds poured out water; the skies gave forth thunder; your arrows flashed on every side. The crash of your thunder was in the whirlwind; your lightnings lighted up the world; the earth trembled and shook. Your way was through the sea, your path through the great waters; yet your footprints were unseen. You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron” (Psalm 77:1-20).

While Psalm 77 may not be the most common Scriptural reference of encouragement for one who is mourning the loss of a loved one, there is incredible perspective available that the psalmist conveys concerning the emotional roller coaster a mourner endures.

• Why did my loved one pass away?

• Why did they pass away in the way they did?

• Why now and not later?

• Why am I left here all alone?

The question of "WHY" in many ways overwhelms the thoughts and leaves a mourner incapacitated from feeling they can move an inch, let alone move on altogether, but that can be somewhat understood by studying the truth of God's Word in Psalm 77.

Mourning is a personal experience where one chooses how they will cope with the feelings associated with loss. There are no specific guidelines for how long mourning should last or in what ways mourning manifests itself, because men and women mourn very differently. Men typically stuff their feelings, compartmentalize, or ignore the emotional pain, while women are usually more expressive in words and by showing their emotion through tears, etc.

Bottom-line, mourning is actually a healthy process of emotionally purging the heart and soul while lamenting the fragility of life itself and honoring the lives of those we love. It provides perspective and an opportunity to reflect on our own life trajectories, whether spiraling downward in sin or growing in communion with Jesus Christ as our Lord, shepherd, and personal Savior.

“The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous and his ears toward their cry” (Psalm 34:15).

EMOTIONAL RELEASE:

Concerning Psalm 77, we learn that the psalmist is unashamed to express his emotions physically through tears, cries, and moans. This should be a huge encouragement to us that expressing emotion is a healthy practice. It cleanses the heart by purging selfish motives concerning loss of the dead. Moreover, it creates space in which the Holy Spirit moves and begins to heal the heart from the inside-out.

The Spirit is ever moving within the heart of those of us who profess Christ as personal Lord and Savior and trust in the power of His resurrection, because we know that we were previously dead in our sin, buried with Christ in His death, and raised again in newness of life through His resurrection.

That personal assurance is what a follower of Christ leans on in times of loss and mourning as his/her source of strength. For in the midst of deep anguish we are resolute, just as the psalmist was, that the Lord will hear our cries because we have previously established a personal relationship with Him through Jesus.

It is important to emphasize the power of prayer and meditation in this situation as well. We cannot quiet the soul after releasing incredible amounts of emotion and mental/physical exhaustion without taking time to listen to the Holy Spirit bestowing wisdom and discernment to mourners who trust in Holy Scripture. For discernment is needed to not be held captive by loss, but to be freed from the potential bondage that depression can bring.

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God” (Romans 8:26–27).

We must remember that mourning is God's gift to cleanse the heart. It is not intended to become a stronghold that leaves us incapacitated to move on and live our lives for God's glory, rather than dwelling on the past. What is most critical to understand from Psalm 77 is that the psalmist's key to success derived from affirming who God is in all His majesty, and by personal spiritual markers where God revealed His faithfulness and sovereignty.

Granted, the psalmist paused to question whether God's grace was sufficient as his fleshly mind questioned the Lord's will, but he quickly gathered himself and allowed the Holy Spirit living within his heart to speak truth despite temptation to blame the Lord.  This is critical, because more often than not we too pause to question God's sovereignty in the midst of uncertainty.

“Why, O LORD, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Psalm 10:1).

SPIRITUAL MARKERS:

Simply stated, God is sovereign, omniscient and omnipresent. He resides outside of the confines of time because He is Alpha and Omega (Revelation 1:8). He is in full control at all times and His will is perfect at any point and in all occasions, providing infinite grace and mercy to His children. And He is law and love manifested in the person of Jesus Christ, His Son the risen Lord, and the Holy Spirit that lives in the hearts of His followers.

Therefore, it should come as no surprise that remembering who God is provides great comfort in the midst of mourning.  For God knows all the answers to our "WHY" questions and reveals them to us in His way and His timing, according to His Word. Similarly, spiritual markers originate from the life of a believer in Christ where God has previously revealed Himself in such a supernatural way that there is no denying He was the source.

“I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your wonders of old” (Psalm 77:11).

Answered prayer is often a common source of spiritual markers, firmly rooting us in times of trouble because we know that God is faithful and His will undeniably will be done regardless of our selfish perspectives and expectations. For God does not conform to our fleshly construct and finite boundaries. Rather, He molds us to His sovereign will as we learn to relinquish personal control and submit in obedience under the authority of His absolute truth.

“But now, O LORD, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand” (Isaiah 64:8).

In the end, mourning is simply an opportunity for us to expose the hurt and pain in our hearts to the healing waters of the Word that testify to the glory and majesty of God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Therefore, we must remember the simple truths that Psalm 77 affirms to us in our times of mourning to cry aloud to God and seek Him, pray and meditate for wisdom and discernment throughout the process, and remember His faithfulness in previous times of need. Only then will we unlock the peace which transcends all understanding and a foundation of truth which gives hope to weary and restless souls.

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path” (Psalm 119:105).